Defense mechanisms are psychological strategies used to cope with reality and maintain self-image. A healthy person can actually use these for the rest of their life. However, when persistence is involved, an ego defense mechanism becomes pathological and leads to maladaptive behavior. Although their true purpose is to protect the mind, self or ego from anxiety, social sanctions and serve as a refuge from any situation, where one cannot cope in real time.

Whenever I feel so much social stress in the workplace, where people are grappling you left and right with so many hang-ups of their own and trying to persuade you according to their means, I just use my favorite mature defense mechanism, which is humor. Actually, I’m just struggling with the defense mechanisms used by other people who also want to cover up their own weaknesses. Of course, most of them do not realize that they are using them unless they know the true meaning of the term and its true demonstration.

Fighting with someone else’s defense mechanism is actually a better skill to consider. I say this because it’s like playing poker with someone where you both keep all your defenses up your sleeves, just waiting for the right moment to turn them off and go head to head with each other. However, you have more better cards compared to your opponent in this event. And again, this is metaphorically speaking. I look at events like these as challenging advice I’ve had in my life. My biggest battle so far is people driven by projection, which is the primitive form of paranoia, and of course people driven by denial. But I still consider the most memorable to be the battle I had with a person fueled by hypochondria.

There are actually four levels of defense mechanisms and knowing them all puts me in a position where I can better deal with the anticipated anxieties of life and the same with a struggling workplace environment. This also adds to my workplace ethics list. It’s just a matter of using it correctly and knowing when to control it to avoid being devoured by your own defense mechanism.

Everyone has the privilege of using their own defense mechanism, whether they are aware that it is a defense mechanism or not. It comes naturally and is most often believed to be a bunch of metaphors that put someone on a podium of power when caught between powerful conflicts. Good to know which one is yours. It enhances your ego function and, most of the time, makes you feel intellectual. This is just one of the wonders of psychology to delve into with yourself.

Anyway, let’s see what your favorite defense mechanism is. Try to answer the following situational questions, contemplate and then check if you practice the defense mechanism in analogous conflict events. Please note that these are not all defense mechanisms. These are just a few for you to ponder.

• Do you tend to ignore conflicting events that can lead you to face a painful reality? Or do you tend to refuse to admit or acknowledge that something has happened or is currently happening? Well, if you do, then your defense mechanism is negated. Actually, denial is the best known of all defense mechanisms. It takes a lot of effort and energy to protect your ego from things you can’t deal with and sometimes to keep these unacceptable feelings out of your awareness.

• Do you tend to have difficulty building relationships because of a traumatic memory? Or do you tend to force yourself to do things to keep unwanted information out of your awareness? Well, the first is repression and the second is repression.

• What about coming home from work, carrying all the frustrations you got from a bad day at work, and unconsciously taking them out on your child, wife, or little brother? You tend to take out your frustrations, feelings, and impulses on people or objects that are less threatening. You call this displacement.

• What about this? Have you seen the movie Catch Me If You Can? The protagonist there became a master of fraud, which is unacceptable in society. When he turned himself in, he became part of the feds who specialize in check fraud and related cases. This is what we call sublimation.

• If you feel like you hate a person and feel like they don’t like you either, you tend to attribute thoughts and impulses to someone else. Be aware that when you abuse this defense mechanism, there is a tendency to lead to paranoia.

• Or are you one of those people who insist on saying “I have to buy another dress because I don’t have anything to wear anymore”. Then one look at his closets, clothes are overflowing from them. You call this rationalization.

• Did you like doing the opposite extreme? Like when you don’t like a co-worker, do you try your best not to criticize that person and instead give them special privileges and advances? Well of course this is my favorite defense mechanism. I just put a little humor to make it more enjoyable and discreet. This is reaction training, also known as reverse psychology. However, I simply call this killing them with kindness.

It is normal to use a defense mechanism because this safeguards the functioning of our ego. It becomes problematic if we use it excessively and we can’t go on without using them without any anxiety involved.